I Miss The Me I Was With You

Have you ever thought to yourself, “I miss me, the old me, the real me, the laughing me, the smiling me, the gone me? I’m sure you have at one time or another. Through the many readings I have done, and messages delivered, these statements resonate. But I have to say what they all mean is I miss the me I was with you.

Birthdays and holidays shared together. But the biggest miss day, in my opinion is the anniversary of their passing. This day arrives as a reminder of yet another year of missing them. Another year of missing the me I was with them. Although the day is sacred, it is tremendously heavy in our hearts. It is the absence of their physical presence. The reminder that we are forever changed because they are no longer by our side.

It is ok to cry and let the tears flow. This day changed future days forever. Even though they are not here their bond with you is not broken. The memories together still live deep within us. They cannot be taken away. The memories are not going anywhere. The tender moments of the laughter you shared still exists. The power of their love still has a special place within you. Those memories and moments transform into stories, lessons and traditions that enable us to continue to honor them.

It is hard to believe and see the world around continue every day, when we were sure our world had stopped. I’m often confused at how it continues. How precious we are to have had the pleasure to be a part of their world. They let us in. They chose to know and love us.

I realize what an effect they had on my life, and they probably didn’t even realize it at the time. Just those thoughts and moments make them into the beautiful soul they are and are to us. The grief we feel is in a way precious because of the love we feel for them. Grief is such a tricky beast. It’s large and grabs us out of nowhere. It is the unwanted guest at the dinner table or the extra passenger in our car. The voice that keeps us up at night followed by the weight that keeps us in bed. There will always be the difficult days, but we do it, we keep going. When that feeling hits, and it’s difficult to breathe, we do it, we keep going. Some days the pain is less but it never truly goes away. A quiet kind of courage grows inside of all of us that says, “keep going.”

There is a quote I think of often. The author is unknown to me. “Be the things you loved most about the people who are in spirit.”

I challenge you, on those difficult days to do something they would do. What can you do to honor them? Maybe do something you did with them, only do it with a friend. Share the story of what it meant to you and create a new memory while honoring a missed one.

It won’t make you miss them any less, but it may make you smile. And after all, I’m sure those we miss the most would want us to smile when we think of them.

I pray you are able to live the life you love and love the life you live by honoring those who were most important in your life.

Blessings,

Stacey